Mommy Guilt is Real and It Really Sucks

I woke up at 5:00 AM this morning for a speaking engagement at the Apple store in Pasadena, it was an amazing experience and I’m so happy I pushed myself out of my comfort zone but I also had to sacrifice missing the first day of school. A day I have never missed since Sienna started daycare. As I drove home from work I felt completely accomplished until the mommy guilt set it in.

Speaking at Apple


So let’s back up, back in June way before back-to-school was on my mind, Apple approached my agency to put on an event. My mental vision board was screaming, “check me off”, so I reluctantly agreed. The thing is I hate public speaking, I hate pitching new work for the agency, and I LOATH networking. However, I know that if I am going to continue to grow professionally and personally, I need to continue to push the boundaries of my comfort levels.

Well into a few weeks of planning this event and confirming dates with Apple and Apple’s “upper management”, which I imagine as a couple of Steve Jobs sitting around some very high tech hologram briefing room, I realized the event was the same day as the first day of school. Ugh.

Initially, I considered backing out and then I reconsidered. I stuck to my commitment and woke up extra early to curl Sienna’s hair and get her ready for school and wish her luck before I rushed out the door. Now, the event wasn’t a smashing a success so was it worth missing out on Sienna’s first day of school? No.  But was Sienna terribly disappointed? Not really.

In other news, tomorrow I’m taking a “vacation day” to take the little ones to the pediatrician for shots. Some days are more laptops than laundry.